All my life I knew that I was different. I also knew that I enjoyed that I was different. When I was 16 years old I came to the realization that I was a homosexual, and because of that realization I decided that I wasn't going to hide it.
My first gay experience with a boy made me realize that this was a world that I belonged to, that I had been outside looking inward, but then a door opened and this world of men loving men became known to me. So far in my life I haven't had to deal with a lot of negativity in regards to my sexuality. I grew up in the state of Texas and a person who has never visited may think that that is strange, but just like any other place in the world, there are good spots and there are bad spots, and I just happened to be in a good one.
When I was 17 years old I came across the Wiccan path, and decided that I wasn't going to hide that either. Before my conversion, life seemed to hold no meaning to me. I found that I was either just a very strange agnostic or I was perhaps borderline atheist, but either way I felt there was something there, but I didn't know what it was. It's strange when you feel that you are trapped in your own skin, and what's inside of you wants to come out, but you're too afraid to do so. I chose to come out.
Some people aren't as fortunate as others who are able to be open about their sexuality and their religious beliefs, and despite the slowly- evolving moral standing of society; it's quite upsetting to know that. Depending on your area or home life, you may have to be closeted for some reason. It's bad enough that society may view Pagans as devil-worshiping, animal sacrificing, lustful orgiastic fanatics, and also they view homosexuals as dirty, sexual deviants, but what happens when they find out that you are both? You would easily be discarded by mainstream society as a "reject", an "outcast", and a "freak."
My response to that would be, "And your point is?"
I choose to be out because I feel that I have no reason to hide. I always told myself that if my family, friends, or area hated me or didn't want me, then I would either just leave or tell them to get over it. I won't have people in my life who don't want me, there are plenty of fish in the sea as they say and I'm sure that there are tons more out there who are looking to know others just like you.
This isn't the 1950's anymore, sex isn't something that is talked about in hushed whispers or what you just read on the wall of the bathroom stalls anymore, and Witchcraft isn't something you just read about in the bible or read in fairy tales and history books; they both are things that are openly displayed and talked about greatly.
We see the same-sex couples holding hands as they walk down the street, or the gay pride flag that is proudly displayed on the front lawn of someone's residence, and we see the 'gothed out' young Pagan with their flashy silver jewelry, or perhaps the more casual person with blue jeans sporting a pentacle; these are all examples of how society is slowly changing for the better.
When I was in my senior year of high school I was open about my lifestyle, despite the fact that the small town my parents moved me to was mainly Christian. I wore my rainbow patch on my backpack and sported my spiral Goddess necklace with pride. Anyone who wanted to know about me freely asked, and those who didn't want to know just turned away.
In my role as the outcast I felt that I had power, not over anyone but of my own life. I was out, and I loved it because I knew fully who I was; that can truly give you a real sense of power when in a less than desirable environment. I embraced it fully.
I feel that someday we won't have to be so selective about who we tell about us, or have to practice our rituals in the dark of the night at home in our rooms; we will someday be able to see a Witch on the street and know that they are just a small part of a big world, and just because they are "different" doesn't make them wrong or evil. The world needs to know that people aren't all the same, and that is just perfectly okay.
The world will have to accept us; it really has no other choice. Condemn us and ridicule us all you want, but we know the truth about who and what we are, and even if the entire world is against you, always know that at least you know who you are and only you can define yourself.
